Penny-pinching parenting

I feel like I'm becoming the Queen of Mean. No, I am not embarrassing people with putdowns Anne Robinson style, I'm just trying to stretch the pound further in our household. Sign of this condition appeared as I grew up in a penny-pinching household (my parents married for love and my mum was 20 when she had me). Going on a tangent, the other day I shocked myself making a parallel between me and her. I have a little girl who is three in April, while my mum was age when I was 23 and at university.

Anyway, back to the development of my mean streak. After I graduated I decided to move to London and lived there for 14 years. The first years I didn't have much money, but managed to save. Eight years later the savings joined a mortgage in the purchase of a Victorian terraced house that needed refurbishing.

Around two years later I met my current partner, sold the house and we bought a house together, our combined savings financing a step up on the ladder and getting us a Victorian semi. When we decided to move out of London in 2008, we sold the house and lived in rental. When the credit crunch cornered us, our savings became both a lifeline and a future deposit on our next house.

It's safe to say that I have been penny-pinch for years for a reason or another. Having already done the renovation on a budget thing, in 2007 I was ripe for the next challenge: budget parenting. This (ironically) was easier in London, where there are plenty of places where you can buy things second hand. I did a lot of freecycling too, which worked out very well as I disposed of things I didn't need anymore and acquired items I needed. This continued in Rugby, where there were plenty of shopping bargain to be had (I became quite fond of charity bazaars and school fetes). And let's not forget the NCT Nearly New Sales, which have been great everywhere I have been. I have been singing their praises in NCT newsletters and online.

So what about Cambridge, my new ciy? There is an NCT sale coming up on 28 March, which I'm very excited about and there are plenty of charity shops (Burleigh Street is a great place for bargains). Freecycle is present here and there are plenty of shopping opportunities, especially with the sales, which have been lasting longer this year. We have been to a few charity bazaars, too. I'm a sucker for homemade jams made by sweet old ladies.

Of course shopping at different shops, chasing bargains and comparing prices require time and effort. So I was particularly excited about John Lewis's new value range as it's one of my favourite department stores. I have already bought three lovely pans for £12 and two really good paring knifes at £1 each. I'm quite tempted by their bedlinen and other bits and pieces below...

John Lewis Value Plain Polyester Cotton Duvet Cover Sets, Blue

http://www.awin1.com/cread.php?awinmid=1203&awinaffid=98103&clickref=&p=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.johnlewis.com%2F34470%2F

John Lewis Value Toaster, 2-Slice, White

http://www.awin1.com/cread.php?awinmid=1203&awinaffid=98103&clickref=&p=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.johnlewis.com%2F230676463%2F

John Lewis Pancake Pans  (complete with free online recipe for Pancakes to celebrate Shrove Tuesday)

http://www.awin1.com/cread.php?awinmid=1203&awinaffid=98103&clickref=&p=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.johnlewis.com%2FMagaz 

And this is an article for baby on a budget with lots of ideas for new parents
http://infantstoddlers.suite101.com/article.cfm/baby_on_a_tight_budget

Chocolat sans frontieres

After Italy won Snowmen Sans Frontieres, I knew there was going to be a rematch. The new challenge was however a friendly international and the team colours were green and black. You guessed, it was chocolate testing with Green & Black's bars, a match made in heaven!

The chocolate challenge
The Italian (moi) felt all superior about it - after all I'm the dark chocolate lover and not a fan of sickly sweet, milk chocolate concoctions with low content of cocoa. The English (my partner) was so cocky he decided to test blindly. So while he turned his back to the eight delectable chocolate bars, I read aloud the instructions kindly provided by our sponsor, Green & Black's, for expert chocolate tasting. The English (nicknamed philistine for his low opinion of most contemporary art) predictably snorted hearing the suggestion that you should put the chocolate in your mouth and pinch the nose (temporarily) to appreciate the taste. The Italian complied, glad there was no mention of spitting in a bucket (like you do for wine tasting).

Testing times
Let's hear it for the flavours! Of the range pictured above, the teams tested Almond, Butterscotch, Cherry, Creamy Milk,  Dark 70%, Dark 85%, Milk and White. The testing order was not alphabetical (sorry but I'm an analist) but, as recommended, we started from the lightest variety and worked our way to Dark 85%.

The (cocoa) scores
At 30% we have White; at 32% we have Creamy Milk; Butterscotch and Milk are 34%,  Almond is 37%, Cherry is 50% and the name says it all for the Dark varieties (70% and 85%).


The match
We started with White as it has the lowest percentage. This was a controversial move as the English (who decided to play with blinkers) proclaimed it was a nice take on the Milky Bar. Italian called for arbitration. Upon discovery that Milky Bar has a whopping 57.7g of sugar per 100g while Green & Black's White has organic raw cane sugar and higher cocoa content, the Italian was feeling pretty confident.
Next on was Creamy Milk, which the English (and self-styled philistine, not to mention fan of Cadbury chocolate) identified it as a Cadbury Dairy Milk tastealike to the horror of the Italian who although not a fan of dairy chocolate could taste the difference (no Sainsbury's pun intended).  
Butterscotch created a truce as both teams agreed it was very tasty, although the English made a sneaky reference to Crunchie bars. Milk chocolate went down a treat, with the Italian muttering about smokey flavours, while the English uttered the C word again! Almond was again an equalizer, despite the suspect reference to peanut cookies from the English, which the Italian deemed a failed Jilly Goolden interpretation as talking about peanuts when almonds are involved is not comme il faut.  
Cherry was our third winner, so moreish, the Italian kidnapped it after the match and had a saucy affair behind a closed bedroom door. The English thought it was like Cadbury's Fruit & Nuts without the Nuts. Last but not least the Dark varieties. Dark 70% was again smokey and sexy for the Italian, while the English reckoned it tasted like the nice dark one at LIDL. The last one was the Dark 85%. Well this was for connoisseurs so as the Italian chewed slowly and a tad pretentiously, the English was not impressed.

The hat trick
Three were the winners: Butterscotch, Cherry and Almond.

Thanks to the sponsor!
Both teams wish to thank the sponsor, Green & Black's for supporting our friendly challenge. Below are wonderful images of Belize, where the cocoa comes from. Willy Wonka, eat your heart out!

Explaining childbirth to a two year old - bees and birds need not apply

Michela has been airing more views on life, the universe and everything. Take life. I showed her a photo of myself when heavily pregnant and told her she was inside it, then showed her a scan. Why? Because she has asked me again the 'embarrassing' question, 'Where do I come from?'

The first time she asked this I thought she was geographically challenged and confused (she was born in London, then we lived in Rugby and now in Cambridge), then I realised what she really meant when she explained to me about Pinga, sister of Pingu being born from an egg. It is such a cute piece of animation - the midwife turns up on ice skates and she has a big spoon to break the egg.

I thought about cabbages, storks, birds and bees and decided I would not go for fairy stories but stick to the truth as much as I could. So I said, that yes, she was an egg in my belly, then became a prawn (the only animal I could think of that is small, pink and resembled her actual size), then grew very big and there was no space so she had to come out. I asked: 'Where do you think you came out from?' and she replied seriously: 'I came out from a booboo.' I couldn't help laughing (booboo is her pet name for breast). I said: 'But the booboo has a tiny hole, you were too big for that.' Michela was adamant and for days she kept saying: 'I came out of a booboo' at all times.

When the entertainment value wore out, I decided to set her straight. I wouldn't want her to go to primary school like I did thinking I came out of my mum's right leg (my mum gave me the talk a bit too late when I was a teen and knew already what was what). So I said she came out of my bottom, which is a word she knows and because we use it for nappy changing as in 'Stay still I need to clean your bottom'.

My moment of truth had hilarious results when Michela put two and two together while we were shopping at a local supermarket. At the till she announced: 'I came from my mama's bottom.' Then she added: 'There is a hole there, I came from the hole.' Nobody said anything but my partner and I nearly fell off laughing at her logical approach (we never mentioned any hole and yes we were amused but slightly embarrassed).

Another deduction that had me bursting into laughter and her dad look sheepish was when Michela saw my partner in the bath, pointed at his bits and asked: 'What's that?'

My partner said it was a willy and Michela announced to me: 'Dada has a big willy' which embarrassed my partner and made me laugh until tears came out of my eyes. She has not announced her discovery in public places yet. We have joked about it at Christmas - children do say the funniest things.

A Norvegian study proclaims breastfeeding is a waste of time

Myself and my daughter Michela 'wasting our time'.

If you haven't heard of this, click here to read all about it from the horse's mouth. This study triggered furore in articles, blogs and social media circles. The Unicef UK Baby Friendly Initiative responded calmy outlining the shortcomings of the study. Click here to read why this small study is flawed compared to larger studies and the simple and unrefutable fact that breast milk has been the only nutrient for babies for centuries (formula arrived in the XXth century). Also bear in mind that Norway has a 99% breastfeeding rate (I found the figure here) and draw your own conclusions.

I'm not surprised that a study has popped out to diminish breasteeding, it's not the only one, what I am really annoyed about is the reaction from some bottle feeding women on various forums. They have an outdated view of breastfeeding organisations and think breastfeeding women are smug and keen on making them feel small and guilty.

Some women are so bitter they leave negative comments under articles who promote breastfeeding. Yesterday I left a comment under an article to say that most breastfeeding organisations are supportive of mums and some even provide bottle feeding information on their sites. There are mums who know this and who ring breastfeeding lines to ask how to stop breasteeding. It's not a taboo subject, if you go cold turkey the pain can be excruciating. Yet there are plenty of formula feeding mums who have an axe to grind.

As a breastfeeding helper I have never treated a mum who mentions formula like an outcast. The aim of my training was to give all the information and leave formula as a last resort because there are mums who cannot breastfeed - although fewer than people think. While researching breastfeeding I came across La Leche League International (LLI), which has a website full of information. I knew of the UK charity but before I trained and received its excellent Book of Breastfeeding Answers, I didn't know you can breastfeed if you have terminal cancer and even HIV.

And did you know that breastfeeding is recommended for smokers? Click here for a great leaflet about breastfeeding versus alcohol, smoking and drugs. Drugs mentioned in this leaflet are medicines, but the LLI has a page on illegal drugs and on this page I found out that you can breastfeed if you are taking methadone to detox.

Formula mothers, the world is not against you and breastfeeding mums encounter as many negative comments from strangers and even family member. I know because of personal experience and because mums told me about their lack of support and negative attitudes towards their decision to breastfeed.

Do you think breastfeeding mums are smug or did you experience negative comments and feedback from your loved ones when you chose to breasteed? Feel free to leave a comment under this blog.

Christmas booboos

Booboos is how Michela calls my breasts. She knows the words breast and booby but prefers booboos, which is one of the first words she uttered to ask for a drink (perhaps because she couldn't say the words breast or boobie?).

When I was a child, I used the word 'boo' to indicate drink. I was bottlefed, so no breast link there, although it's curious as I grew up in Italy while my daughter is growing up in England and knows very little Italian (despite good intentions, the 'bilingual project' has failed miserably).

Last week we went to a Christmas Carol Service for the staff of the University of Cambridge and realised that there is a breastfeeding carol.

Enough for Him, whom cherubim
Worship night and day,
A breastful of milk
And a mangerful of hay;
Enough for Him, whom angels
Fall down before,
The ox and ass and camel
Which adore.

The words of this carol are from a poem by Christina Rossetti called In The Bleak Midwinter (read more about by clicking here). Michela was asleep during the service, so she didn't catch the reference. She loves hearing about baby Jesus as it is a baby with two loving parents, which is easy to relate to, although her birth didn't involve an ox, donkey nor any sheep. As all toddlers, Michela is fascinated by animals and she loves looking at illustrations where the baby Jesus is surrounded by all sort of animals, one book even includes a family of chickens.

I'm signing off with a charity initiative involving a stunning calendar, which, like the glamorous painting by Tamara de Lempicka shown above, displays beautiful breastfeeding mums. I have mentioned the calendar before, it's in aid of Rugby Breastfeeding Cafe, which is run by volunteers. See a slideshow of the pics by clicking here.


Happy Xmas to you all....

Snowmens sans frontieres...

The winner of the December 09 challenge (with hat and sans hat)

 The December 2009 winner (detail) and the snowmen from the January 2009 challenge (English snowman at the back)

Forfeit victory to the Italian contender
Yesterday evening the snow started falling again and it continued overnight so by morning there was a thick blanket in the back garden. The snowmam challenge was on so the two contenders stepped out with pint-sized referee Michela in tow.

The English and Italian contenders made a start but the English contender did a Paula Radcliffe (I can't make a snowman with this kind of snow). The Italian contender completed the challenge by building a snowman against a tree. There was hissing and spitting from the English side who awarded nul points to the snowman as it was not free standing. However, the referee awarded a forfeit victory to the Italian contender.

This is the second victory for Italy as the previous snowman challenge in January 2009 was won by the Italian on the grounds of endurance. The English snowman didn't last due to shoddy workmanship. The Italian contender generously revealed the secret behind the two victories: 'Snow must be compatted and worked bit by bit, simply rolling won't produce a good, sturdy snowman.'

Can you produce a better snowman? The e-challenge is still on... Send your pics to membersfeedback at hotmail.co.uk and I will upload them.

Snow, wall of shame and a heartwarming story

Today it snowed while we were walking in central Cambridge.

The magic was short lived. When we came out from the library, the sun had reappeared and an icy wind blew on us all the way back home.

Snow aside, we have a white mountain in our lounge, which I call the wall of shame. Behind the white sheet there is a solid wall of cardboard boxes full of stuff we couldn't fit in the garage. We are lucky we did find a house to rent with a garage, but even covered, our wall of shame is a bit of an eyesore. I stuck a poster on it and a few Xmas decorations but it still looks like a mess. I'm hoping this is a temporary arrangement but who knows if we will ever find a house to buy...

The mess underneath is Michela's collection of toys and books. We have piles in all rooms. The grownup place we planned pre-birth never happened. Ultimately the toys have won the war. I am becoming addicted to crates, especially lidded ones.

Lastly, the moving story. I was sent this link through a forum and it is such a heartwarming tale, perfect for the festive season (or indeed all year round)! The headline says it all: Nursing Moses: Moms step in after infant's mother dies. Before you click on it, have some hankies ready!

SNOW UPDATE: my partner stepped out the front door onto a blanket of snow. It must have started snowing when we were snug inside with our curtains drawn. Just looked out into our snowy garden, it is still snowing....

Eat your heart out, Jamie Oliver

Tonight I watched Jamie Oliver make American pancakes with his daughters and found it hilarious that he didn't know the secret of making real American pancakes. The pancakes he made were as thin as Scotch pancakes (sometimes called dropped scones).

I have been making American pancakes for years and the secret is in the baking powder. If you want a thick, fluffy American pancake you need to use American or Canadian baking powder as it is stronger than the British one. Years ago, I asked a friend to get me some and the results were spectacular. I have been making some mean blueberries pancakes, stacks of thick ones!

I'm not sure the photo shows how thick they really are. I top my pancakes with maple syrup as I find the American syrup too sweet, but in this instance you're looking at toffee sauce.

If you can buy American or Canadian powder online or through a friend, you will notice the difference. I'm currently using the aptly named Canadian Magic baking powder and the recipe sent to me by Peter, a Canadian friend, in the mid-90s.

If there is any interest, I will post the full recipe.

Christmas in Cambridge

We are settling down well in Cambridge thanks to my volunteering and the friendly locals. The city is so beautiful and there is lots to do with a toddler! I have posted about cheap days out on Ecothrifter, click here for toddler-taming, fun ideas.

What I like most is that it's such a walkable city and there are plenty of free attractions suitable for families. Walking the streets when it's dark is quite magical with the fab Xmas lights and carol singing everywhere we go. I was quite tempted to go to the Kings' College Carol event on Christmas eve, but then found out that you have to get there before 9am and queue for hours! Too crazy for us...

Sales are already on!

This is a truly Credit Crunch Crimbo if the January's sales are already on! From sofas to shoes, sales are spreading like wildfire....

Here are few links for you - Happy Shopping

Clarks

           
           

Kaleidoscope

            
          

Play.com
New Play.com voucher code live till 13.12.09 (midnight)! The code is SECRETSANTA50 and entitles the customer to 50% off selected products on this page.

Mini Barratts

           
           

I got lots of emails about offers but these are the best deals so far! If you know of any great sales, please leave a comment below..