Exclusive Q&A with Emma Forbes

Emma Forbes, who has recently launched her very own lifestyle website Forbes Style (http://www.forbesstyle.com/)

 
I was looking for samples for a beauty feature I want to run on my blog, when I was offered the opportunity to feature a Q&A with celebrity mum-of-two Emma Forbes. I was allowed to pick the questions and as I've been following the recent controversy about weaning with great interest, I asked her opinions on this much-debated issue. Of course it was all a storm in a teacup as the study that sparked the controversy wasn't really advocating changes. As the NCT puts it: "The media furore surrounding the story was a surprise to the NCT. To start with, the article was not based on new research, but an opinion piece that raised questions and did not provide any new evidence, alter policy or recommendations."

Anyhow, here are Emma's replies to my request of a comment on the weaning controversy and/or to recall her own experiences, at a time when guidelines advocated earlier weaning. As this is a homeworking and parenting blog, I also asked if she had any recipes for time-strapped mums (and she should know since she has a lot of commitments!).

Emma on weaning "Weaning was very different then (14 years ago). I basically started Lily and Sam from three months onwards with a little rice put into the last feed at night... and then when it came to introducing solids, I used to make all my own purees! Their favourite was banana and avocado blended together (it may sound gross but it has the perfect consistency and is full of protein and filling, too). I loved experimenting with different mixes and used to freeze them in ice-cube trays to take out when needed.

Emma's quick recipes for busy mums

"My main time-saving method is one-pot cooking! This is perfect for time-strapped mothers as you shove it all in one pot and then bake in the oven. Here are a few recipes... 

Chicken casserole 

This is a foolproof, one-pot, crowd pleaser for any family! Serves 8

Ingredients:

• flour to season, salt and pepper
• 8 chicken breasts and 8 thighs, skinned  
• knob of butter
• a couple tbsp of olive oil
• one onion, finely chopped 
• one clove of garlic, chopped
• half a glass of white wine (optional)
• 2 pints of stock (made from vegetable bouillon or chicken stock cubes)
• 8 carrots, peeled and chopped
• a few potatoes, peeled and chopped
• one spring of rosemary
• 3 handfuls of pearl barley

Method:

1 Preheat the oven to a low heat. Lightly sprinkle some flour in a bowl and place the chicken in it, seasoned with salt and pepper. Stir the pieces to coat them.

2 In a large casserole pan, melt the butter with the olive oil and add the chicken. Add the onion and the garlic and cook until the chicken is browned all over and the onion is just translucent.

3 If you have any leftover white wine, add it to the casserole and let it bubble. Add the stock, the carrots, potatoes and rosemary.

4 Bake in the oven for around two hours (keep checking to see how it's cooking and adjust the heat if necessary). In the last 30 minutes, add the pearl barley. Add salt and pepper to taste before serving.

Tip: Don’t worry about using precise quantities, experimenting is part of the fun, especially when using leftovers or whatever is handy.

Easy but healthy recipes for older babies and toddlers
Stir-fries are great… stir-fry chopped vegetables and shredded chicken with a little oil, add a squidge of lemon and some soy sauce, voila! Serve with boiled egg noodles – not only is this really easy for small children to eat and digest, it’s good for them too.

I do three-minute guides on www.forbesstyle.com/category/tv/, including how to  bake brownies with children, which is a fab activity for a rainy Sunday afternoon! 

As Emma signs off, I visit her new website, which covers a wide range of topics. Aside food, there are articles and inspiration on homes, fashion, parenting, travel, health and wellbeing. And if you need to vent on an issue close to you, there is a space for that too! I will certainly try her casserole recipe, after all Emma was a finalist on Celebrity Masterchef.

UPDATE, February 2015: Emma's website is now offline. It might have changed its address or being taken down. Do let me know what happened to it!

Toys for all ages - and you get to support a parenting charity!

Not sure what to buy for your child or your friend's tot?

Here is an extract from an article I wrote for an NCT newsletter. All toys are available at www.nctshop.co.uk (all profits go to support the work of a national charity). Prices right at the time of posting. There might be sales in January.

From birth
Sneezy (£27.99) has a squeak in his nose and crinkle ears/wings. One hand rattles, the other squeaks, a mirror hides in a pocket, a flower pops out of another, a bell rings in his tail! Whoozit (£7.99) crinkles, rattles, squeaks and has a mirror hidden under its nose.

From three months

Double-sided activity centre (£39.99) One side has six different activities, a mirror that shows the under patterns of the spinner, a squeak, knocker, twirl and happy face that lights and plays music. The other side has buttons to press that cause the flower to spin, the frog to pop up, plus levers make noises and four musical instrument buttons that play Bach. Attach to the cot or play on the floor. Age: 3-24 months. Suitable from birth, the Winkel (£7.99) comes in handy when your baby is teething, which can start at around three months. It’s BPA free, easy to hold and soft to chew. Chilled, it makes a soothing teether.

 Nine-12 months

Wooden baby walker (£34.99). In brightly coloured wood with rubber rimmed wheels, it comes with 24 shaped and coloured blocks. This updated version of the traditional walker is very stable, giving toddlers confidence while they learn to walk. Sidney School Bus (£10.99). Award-winning friction-powered shape sorting toy, complete with six shapes and driver. Age: from 12 months.

Katie's Camper

From 18 months
Katie’s Camper Holiday Friends (£22) Sturdy, friction-powered toy full of features inside. Everything packs away neatly for easy storage. Or Flip ’n’ Tip Fred (£27.99). Sturdy truck that promotes ‘green’ thinking. Friction powered with tipping loader and other features. Stack ’n’ pull Dinosaur (£14.99). Stockable wooden toy.

 From two years
Ark (£24.99). Includes Mr & Mrs Noah with six
pairs of animals and one pair of doves. Animals
and figures can be stored inside the ark. The top
half of ark attaches to the base with magnets. Not
to be used in water. Crocodile name jigsaw (£8.99). Teach your child to spell their name! Letters can only be put together in the correct order.



From three years
Oldfield Farm (£44.99). The wooden play base includes barn with loft and
ladder, animal shed, farmhouse, pig sty and fences. The roof panels attach with magnets. Farm Animals are sold separately and include pairs of cows, pigs, lambs, chickens and ducks. This toy is still popular with kids up to nine years of age. Danny’s diving adventure (£10.99). This bath toy is suitable from 18 months but my three year old (and other toddlers at the preschool) is still enthusiastic about water play! Open the boat to discover the secret cabin inside and use the spring loaded diving board to shoot the figures into the water.

Wooden wonders

If for you plastic is not fantastic, here are a few more wooden toys from the NCT shop.

Rattle

• Rattle (£5.99). Made up of colourful beads and bell, it will keep your baby amused. Age: 6 months plus.
• Push-along seal or butterfly (£13.99). Push along the seal and watch the ball spin. Or you can go for a butterfly and flowerpot alternative. Age: 1 year plus
• Sorting cage (£14.99).Push the shapes through the corresponding holes into the wooden cage. Age: 18 months plus.
• Rolling slope (£34.99). A retro looking toy for car-mad toddlers. Age: 2 years plus.

How volunteering rocks my world, plus breastfeeding news!

Breastfeeding a baby to sleep: classed as a bad sleep habit but a lifesaver for some mums

As I have already explained in an older post How I became a Homeworker, I find volunteering very rewarding from a personal and professional point of view. I get a warm feeling when I can donate my time to a good cause and it also benefits my working life.

I started volunteering in 1994 and through that first role as a fundraiser I acquired database and computer skills, plus learnt how to write a charity mail shot. This led to temporary bookings as database researcher, which was my first media job.

Between 1997 and 1999 I was in the committee of Women in Publishing, when I found the 'lost' archive and organised a few events. One was about independent bookshops and featured, among others, the occult bookshop Watkins! I volunteered for WiP hoping to get a job in book publishing but then switched to magazines after I trained as a subeditor. Still, I met many wonderful women, got some confidence and did chat to Fay Weldon, one of my fave feminist writers, at a Wip Christmas party.

So when I took maternity leave in January 2007,  I was itching to do something else and started volunteering for the NCT in the newsletter team. After some training I added another arrow to my volunteering bow by becoming a breastfeeding helper with the BfN. While the first role consolidated my writing/design skills and led me to specialise in parenting as a freelance writer, the latter gave me valuable knowledge about breastfeeding, which, again helped my writing. There is so much conflicting information about breastfeeding and knowing where to look and how things really work help me write good material. Recently I started helping out at my daughter's preschool, which is just lovely.

So after singing the praises of volunteering, here are some breastfeeding news, courtesy of my Google alert...

Is breastfeeding really best? Mum of five Aileen Hickie says mothers should not be bullied into breastfeeding... click here to read more.

I felt sad reading this article. Ireland has one of the lowest breastfeeding rates in Europe.

Facebook has 'boobed' by banning a picture of a woman breastfeeding her baby... click here to read more. 

Hip Hip Hooray... the penny has finally dropped! I know quite a few women who have proudly put pics up that have been censored.

"I need some advice about giving up breastfeeding. Please don’t judge me harshly. I have battled for six weeks trying to do it, but I am so miserable and am getting very down about it. Click here to read more.

Again, I felt really sad reading this as she has looked for help but cannot cope. I looked up stopping breastfeeding and there was very little info online, even on trusted encyclopedic websites like La Leche League International and Kellymom. As breastfeeding charities are supportive of mums’ choices, this question should be addressed fully. Going cold turkey, especially in the early weeks, could lead to engorgement and even mastitis. I also think that more expressing information should be out there as some mums might want to stop breastfeeding but still wish to give breast milk to their baby. The BfN has a great expressing leaflet here.

Breastfeeding moms don't get less sleep, says a headline on Reuters’ website. Click here to read more.
Yes, they actually get more sleep - this study proved it three years ago.

Breastfeeding is now compulsory in Indonesia as a law has been passed that stipulates all babies should be exclusively breastfed for the first six months. Click here to read more.
Wow! There are fines up to £7,000 and a prison sentence up to one year. Some might think it’s a case of nanny state but according to a recent government survey, "almost 40% of the children under five who were surveyed reported stunted growth due to malnutrition".

How I became a home worker

When I started maternity leave in January 2007 I planned to take a year off and resume my career as inhouse freelance subeditor. I had been doing it for over a decade, so it seemed like the easy option - I had lots of contacts in the industry and knew there would be work for me provided I could find reliable childcare for my child. Mind you, I envied freelancers who could work from home but knew that in my sector opportunities were rare, plus you needed expensive equipment and software. Despite using MACs at work, I had a modest PC at home and no fancy design software.

I soon realised I was missing work so jumped at the chance of using my skills for the NCT, which is the leading parenting charity in the UK. I had become a member before doing their antenatal classes and heard that they were looking for a volunteer to help the newsletter editor at the East London branch. I ended up coediting various newsletters, churning out articles and designing my half with zero budget (we had only money for printing costs). I was lucky to secure a free copy of QuarkXpress by buying a PC magazine so I could use the professional software I was accustomed to. I did enjoy both the writing and the design side. One year later, I was not ready to go back to work. I was enjoying a busy life as charity volunteer, doing some editing work from home (not much though) and training as a breastfeeding helper with the Breastfeeding Network. I started to volunteer for this second charity by assisting my tutor who ran a breastfeeding drop-in in East London. In summer 2008, just before the credit crunch hit the country, I moved to Rugby, where I became involved with the NCT, became newsletter designer and editor of the local newsletter and got involved with the Rugby Breastfeeding Cafe as a volunteer.

Not being in London meant a longer commute if I wanted to resume my career as subeditor. The recession also meant less freelance work so although I had set up my writing and editing business (and created a website to plug it), I was mostly giving Italian lessons and even taught an evening class at a local institute. Then I heard of a new parenting website that needed product testers and I sent my CV. I started writing product reviews, while running two blogs (this one about parenting and one about eco-friendly thrifting) and volunteering for my charities.

In November 2009 we moved to Cambridge, where I joined the local NCT branch and became involved with the newsletter and started volunteering at breastfeeding drop-ins. Soon after our move I got an email from an advertising agency who wanted me to write breastfeeding and baby care copy. It turned out to be a big project so I left tutoring behind and became a fully-fledged online copywriter, contributing to parenting websites whenever I could. I have recently started indexing academic journals, which is regular work and makes me feel that my degree in Political Sciences is of some use.

So far I have produced several NCT newsletters for various branches and learnt a lot about design, commissioning, advertising and the printing process. As a subeditor for major national magazines I was part of a big team, so I was only involved in editing, rewriting, writing the odd feature, fact-checking and perhaps a bit of design but didn’t have to concern myself with production processes, distribution, overall costs and advertising revenue. I kept in touch with the media industry through moderating a group called subsuk (from 2006 till practically yesterday) but have given this up as I am now a copywriter more than a journalist. I’m not the only one, most people I know from journo forums have moved into PR, advertising, corporate writing and more lucrative fields. Aside writing and indexing I volunteer for my two charities and have started to get involved in my daughter’s preschool activities.

So this is the story so far. The picture at the top is my office, basically an antique kitchen table (there is nice wooden top under the plastic cloth) full of useful junk. Below it’s my filing unit, which is a pine dresser my father made bespoke for the kitchen of my previous house. Inside there are backup DVDs and office supplies, on the shelves you can see my reference library and various odds and ends belonging to my child, including her red book and craft materials. More stationery is parked on top of the blue chest of drawers, one of my ‘revamp junk furniture’ projects.

There is a spare room upstairs which has been kitted out as an office but it’s not practical as I need to keep an eye on my daughter when she is at home. She goes to preschool three hours every afternoon and unless my partner is at home, she is around while I toil away. If I need total silence I work after she has gone to bed or wake up really early in the morning.

Now over to you! If you work from home, feel free to link up relevant blog posts and leave comments. I confess I do miss social interaction but not the commuting to different workplaces every week (unless I got a long-term gig) nor the office politics, from which an inhouse freelancer is not totally immune.

Adopt a vineyard row in Italy

I believe in giving back to the community, so I have been a volunteer for different causes for several years. Since I have become a parent, my charities of choice have been the NCT and the Breastfeeding Network. I have been involved with NCT newsletters since 2007 and with the BfN since 2008. I'm currently editing/designing the Cambridge NCT newsletter and volunteering as Breastfeeding Helper at local NHS baby clinics. But what has a picture of a vineyard got to do with all this?
   
When I visited my family in Italy in August, I heard of another good cause, which I'd like to showcase here. I grew up in a small village called Castagnole Lanze, located in Piedmont between Asti and Alba. For those of you who don't know the region, the capital city is Turin, where the 2006 Winter Olympics were held. Asti is renown for its Palio and wines (don't be fooled by dire Asti Spumante versions sold in supermarkets), Alba has a donkey Palio and a truffle fair. That's where the prestigious white truffle comes from - its nickname 'the white diamond' says it all. Piedmont wines are hearty and full of body (Barbera, the famous Barolo, Barbaresco... click Piedmont wines for more info).

Now, this initiative, which struck such a cord that it made national TV news, is championed by local residents with the support of the council. All is explained at www.lanze.it, which has an English version. All you have to do is to download a form, fill it and email it back with your payment.

The adoption contract consists of:  

• Choice of the row in your favourite vineyard
• Name and surname of the adoptee on the adopted row wooden head stake
• Instant information on the status of the adopted row by webcam on the website
• Opportunity to visit and attend the row processing, harvesting and winemaking
• A minimum of 12 bottles of 0.75 litres of high quality Barbera
• Personalised label with name and surname of the adoptee, row number and name of the vineyard
• Possibility of presenting the row to friend or loved one as a unique gift

These are the objectives of the campaign:   

• Land and wine landscape safeguard and protection, as a candidate for UNESCO World Heritage List
• Ensuring the survival of grapes producers, custodians of the land
• Search more high-quality product in the bottle
• Creation of tourist itineraries in the territory
• Encourage and reward "loyal Tourism"

Interested? Visit www.lanze.it for more info.

A row of Barbera

Women's Day - my daughter's first march

Having picked up a flyer about events celebrating International Women's Day in Cambridge, I decided to join the Women For Women International March from Victoria Bridge to Magdalene Bridge. Michela and I arrived at the start just before 12. It was a cold morning but there was a lot of enthusiasm and we got a few smiles as Michela was the only child in the march. I'm not quite sure why, a few mums stopped to write messages on the banner but they didn't join.
After a few really good speeches, truly inspirational and heartfelt (unlike a lot of trite stuff spouted on TV debates) we marched towards Magdalene Bridge, bang in central Cambridge, where we heard a few more inspired speakers and enjoyed the performance of a drumming group. Michela really enjoyed this bit and I was glad to join in the dance to warm my frozen limbs.
Talking to some women during the march made me realise that although I have lost an active interest in politics (despite my degree in Political Sciences), I was still holding on to some ideals and trying to do my bit. I have always been shy with strangers and getting involved with various projects in the local community as a charity volunteer (for NCT and Breastfeeding Network) has made me feel active and more confident at times when looking after a child felt like I had mothballed my brain away for future use.

I'm full of admiration for the speakers, women who are involved in international projects to help and protect more vulnerable women. As a speaker pointed out, in the UK we do have a level of protection and access to medical help. It might not be perfect but we don't have to fear for our lives or starve like many women and children in war-ravaged countries.

Happy International Women's Day! 

Women's Day - local and international events March 2010

• International Women's Day (apostcardaday.blogspot.com)
• Join me on the Bridge (International Women's Day) (one.org)
• World marks International Women's Day (cnn.com)
• International Women's Day Events in Cambridge  
• http://live.reuters.com/Event/International_Womens_Day_2010_2

First impressions on living in Cambridge

Image by Getty Images via Daylife

We have been in Cambridge barely over a week and I feel at home already.

On the day of our move, the Queen visited the city to participate in the University's 800th anniversary celebrations. We missed the pageantry, all we saw were boxes and massive pieces of furniture being unloaded from two huge trucks.

Having relocated from London to Rugby and then from Rugby to Cambridge, I have lost a fair amount of friends and acquaintances. But I can recommend volunteering as a way to fit in quickly wherever you live.

Since the birth of my daughter I have been volunteering for two children’s charities: the NCT and the BfN. So as soon as I knew I was heading here, I contacted them both. Soon after my arrival, I went to an NCT meeting and a social, tomorrow I am going to a BfN drop-in for breastfeeding mums.

Today another opportunity to get involved locally arose when the organiser of the neighbourhood watch turned up, so yes, I’m going to a meeting next week.

This week I also met with an NCT member I used to know when we both lived in London and also with a mum from mumsnet. So internet forums can be handy too. And talking about the internet, there is a great local site for people living in Cambridge: Cambride Online. It has reviews and links to anything in the city.

I’m looking forward to experience all Cambridge has to offer. When I was living in Rugby, I did miss the buzz I get from living in a city, the cosmopolitan mix and the amenities. I'm not looking forward to buying our home as the property market is hard to crack here. For the moment we are renting and it's such a quiet area, despite being not too far from the centre.

Code 2ZJB8MW8R943

Breastfeeding as a parenting tool

On Fridays I volunteer at a local breastfeeding cafe. I used to do that in London, alongside one of my tutors (I think I mentioned in my first or second post that I did a breastfeeding course with a charity). Anyhow, I have been supporting breastfeeding mums for around a year and a half and it has been one of the most satisfying things that I have ever done. I'm not discounting other volunteering work I do for the NCT, but seeing tiny babies grow into beautiful, healthy toddlers can't be topped!

After this intro, allow me to take my breastfeeding volunteer's hat off and talk about my personal experiences (as a volunteer you are discouraged to use your own experience - the aim is to provide evidence-based, unbiased information). So with my hat off, let's talk about why I still breastfeed my two year old (pictured above). If I have to explain it in a nutshell, I'd use the expression I once encountered in the BfN's newsletter and which forms the title of this blog.

How can breastfeeding be a parenting tool? First of all, let me add that Michela drinks cow milk and eats plenty of dairy,  so breastmilk is not a 'necessity'.

Tool no.1: if she is naughty and I am running out of patience,  I say that I will give the breastmilk to her dad instead or even have it myself (sounds silly but it works). Of course I won't deprive her, but the threat is enough. Tool no.2: breastmilk is convenient and full of goodness. This became more apparent when we travelled across France and all the hotels had no fridges so I didn't have anywhere to store cow milk for her (I did order it in one cafe and they brought over the UHT milk, which is foul tasting to say the least). And the goodness? Well, breastmilk is packed with antibodies that fight disease - they also protect your baby from short/long-term health problems (and the mum, too, for more info click here). Well, it did work wonders for us as Michela has been to the GP twice since birth for illnesses (once for an eye infection passed on by another baby and the second time when she contracted a stomach bug). She has had colds but they don't last long and they are never serious. While I was very ill with my cough and cold she just had a little sniffle.

Let me make something clear now, I am not afraid to mention the F word (as in formula) and will not judge mothers who cannot or don't breastfeed - with my breastfeeding helper hat's and the NCT's one on, I aim to support all mums' choices. The NCT publishes a really lovely sheet called Reasons to Be Proud, which shows the benefits of even just one breastfeed for mum and baby (list goes up to 2 years of age).

Back to my theme. I have listed discipline and health and I will now add sleep aid as tool no.3. The only way to get Michela to have a daytime nap is to lure her into my bed for a breastfeed. And of course, it's very handy in the evening - no sleep routine needed. When she is gone, my partner transfers her in her bed.

I sometimes wonder what would have happened if I had gone back to work inhouse. Well, I could have breastfed her in the mornings and/or evenings and at weekends. At this stage, whatever the frequency, the supply is there. Whether she breastfeeds once a day, three times or more, milk is made on demand.

I'm sure there are other tools to be added, but these are the main ones and they make my life easier. The WHO and Unicef recommend breastfeeding until 2 and beyond. This is crucial in countries where unsanitary conditions make formula feeding a health hazard for the babies. Don't take my word for granted, click here.

So why were mums who breastfeed toddlers and older children treated as freaks in the TV programme Extreme Breastfeeding? The reason is simple, ignorance. When Michela was a tiny baby and I saw a woman breastfeeding a toddler at a drop in for mums, I thought it was freakish. Now I'm the freak. That's poetic justice for you!

My top tips: more than tips, I'd like to recommend this site for any breastfeeding problem www.kellymom.com (it's incredibly comprehensive and it was recommended to me by my BfN tutors). For an overview of organisations that help breastfeeding mums, read www.simonecastello.co.uk/breastfeedingdebate.pdf; for tips on positioning and attachment, read www.simonecastello.co.uk/breastfeedingsupport.pdf.

Is TV my Supernanny?

This is a rhetoric question because since we’ve been back from our holidays, Michela has been watching TV for longer than I’m comfortable with.

I tell myself: ‘At least she’s watching educational videos/DVD (Spot’s Alphabet, Mr Men’s Alphabet, Postman Pat’s 123, Animal Numbers, Fun with ABC and Mister Fuzzy Felt's Nursery Rhymes) and quality programmes like Titch, Sesame Street, In the Night Garden and Noddy (the puppet series).

Although she’s only 2, she's articulate, keen on counting (up to 20 now and can do simple maths) and learning to read (she can read Toyota on my partner’s car). She loves books and reads in bed with me most mornings. She also likes being active - if I propose a fun activity, she will forgo the TV and join in. And often the TV becomes a background noise as she starts playing with her toys.

However, despite all these buts, I feel I’m guilty of parking her in front of the TV so I can get on with writing or doing household chores.

Experts’ views
Dr Aric Sigman, associate fellow of the British Psychological Society, told MPs in 2007 that watching TV puts children at risk of health problems, including attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and obesity. He recommended that children under three shouldn't be exposed to TV at all. And children between three and seven should watch no more than 30 minutes to an hour a day. He also asked the Government to publish recommended daily guidelines for TV watching.

Other experts are less extreme in their views, advising parents to choose TV programmes with an educational value, in which the fun factor can foster learning. They also recommend parents to watch TV with their children – which I sometimes do as I love kids programmes (I admit I bought the full series of Bagpuss for myself). The key is to strike the right balance and set limits.

This is all very well with an older child, but it’s quite hard to reason with a clever toddler going through the Terrible Twos phase. And she is not easy to manipulate either, she always knew what she wanted since the start – remember her hatred of the Moses basket?

Another piece of advice is to lead by example. Well, I rarely watch daytime TV, I’m mostly online, working on something or other. But as soon as alarm bells ring, I switch off the TV and try to suggest some activity for her to do, and mostly end up having to play with her.

It’s hard as I want to spend time with her but she expects me to be her playmate all day long. As she refuses to go to sleep in the afternoon and goes to bed between 8 and 9pm, I am struggling to keep up. After a bit of play with her, I get tired and/or need to do some work and the TV goes back on. This is especially true of rainy days, today it’s sunny so she is happily playing with sand in the garden as I type.

In his report, Dr Sigman stated that, aside the health risks, allowing children under three to watch TV can impair their social and linguistic development. I’m not sure about this bit, Michela could speak well since she was one and she has an amazing repertoire of nursery rhymes which she sings at home and when we are out and about. I often join in while we are cruising the supermarket’s aisles. Plus she learnt to count/recognise figures from a TV programme.

What do you think?
But enough about me and let’s hear from other parents. I kick off the debate with opinions that were posted on the NCT editors’ forum when Dr Sigman’s report hit the headlines.

Emma argues that there are some wonderful television shows and DVDs that demand action by children and probably parents too. ‘Who could watch the Wiggles without dancing and singing along? What better way to learn the alphabet than with Elmo’s gentle guidance? How many of us have tried trickle painting or made crazy icecream sundaes with our children after watching Teletubbies? As for Sigman’s language anxiety – how many of us have seen our children’s language expand exponentially as they learn words and phrases from their favourite shows? Or seen them gradually learning social conventions from examples on screen and then apply them with growing confidence in everyday life? It seems strange to me that Dr Sigman is worried about children not having any attention span… because they are paying too much attention to the television! I say embrace the learning and entertainment possibilities that televisual entertainment – particularly DVDs – offers to us and our children!’

Another editor also called Emma says: ‘I was really relieved to hear of another mum who, like me, has the TV on most of the day in the background. It seems to be becoming such a taboo to admit your children watch any TV but it's fairly obvious when they know the catchphrases and can identify names of every character in the programmes! My son is also nearly 3 and has a great vocabulary, and I have no worries with him developmentally at all. In fact the programme Numberjacks taught him to count. How can that possibly be a bad thing? I talk to him about the programmes and we make up stories about the characters. TV is such a stimulating medium that, in the right hands, it can be a fantastic tool to your child's development. Obviously you do have to be selective. I stick solely to the programmes that are designed for his age group, and try to avoid channels with adverts (although it does make me laugh when he says with a very serious expression that he wants the Barbie fairy karaoke wings!!). Another great thing about having the TV on very often is that it stops being a “big thing”, and he doesn't beg to watch it or complain if we turn it off. Also round friends' houses its not a problem if it isn't on. Finally, I watch quite a bit of TV myself and always have, and I refuse to be a hypocrite and say it’s not good for you. I'm a teacher so it can't have done me too much harm.’

Pete says: ‘Let's start with how much my two children are allowed to watch: Isaac - aged 8 and Abigail - aged 10. In the week - none before school, and possibly 30 mins after tea. During the weekend, one hour or so before breakfast, and maybe two hours in the evening. They watch The Simpsons - good to develop an alternative sense of humour (though most of it goes over their heads); wildlife; cookery programmes, Scrap Heap Challenge. They used to watch Tellytubbies, Fimbles, the usual stuff, plus Tom & Jerry (nothing wrong about politically incorrect cartoon violence); Danger Mouse and Art Attack (they still love it). To be honest we have controlled their telly watching for the following reasons:
1. If they watch too much before breakfast they get very 'arsy' afterwards
2. There's a wide world out their waiting to be explored
3. It makes it more of a treat when we actually sit down for 3 hours on a rainy day and watch a Harry Potter DVD or back to back Blue Planet on DVD
4. As parents we have never been great TV watchers
My daughter would watch TV for England given half the chance, but Isaac gets bored after an hour and will go find something else to do. My view is that report is a bit simplistic. I suspect that parents who do not partake of the appropriate social intercourse with children are more of a contributory factor in terms of brain developement, and if the parents are sedentary then I suppose the childern may also take on that aspect of obesity.
I would say TV is a catalyst to conditions, just like the motor car is in terms of making us fat and lazy, and socially isolated in our travelling environment. If we had no cars, more children might play in the streets, and actually find less reasons to watch TV.
So I think TV (like the car) when used appropriately can be used to broaden the education of children, however to let them sit in front of the inane guff that is on Cartoon network does not do them nay harm if it is balanced with other TV and non TV activities. Abigail has always been advanced for her age, with an IQ somewhere about 2 years ahead of her actual age, and Isaac has an IQ 4 years ahead of his age. We did a lot of reading with them when they were younger, and also where ever we went we would point out things. In some ways we behaved a bit like Telletubbies ourselves by pointing out and observing what was going on. I also take a view that Dr Aric is probably a psychologist not a scientist, and maybe parents should read Mapping The Mind by Rita Carter, a fascinating book that talks on simple language about how the human brain works, and why it has evolved to be so, and talks how lack of love and attention is a huge factor in children.

My top tips: I’m going to give play dough a whirl next time it rains! And if you want to get out and about with other like-minded parents, why not join the NCT? I love their socials! 

The story so far... part two

I went into labour on Easter Monday. Giving birth was a relief rather than a scary experience - the size of my bump had made my life difficult in the last months, with back pain, sciatica, a spot of haemorrhoids... My partner timed me walking (a personal joke) and it would take me double the time to reach the shops.

I pushed Michela Celeste out in the world on 10 April at 8am. Gas and air made me high (I've never taken drugs before but my partner says that I kept talking and laughing while lying on the hospital bed). I remember being pain free for most of it, also thanks to a diamorphine (or was it pethidine) injection. Michela being a big girl (she weighed in at 8lb 2oz and was 52cm long), it took me hours to push her out and I was exhausted. I think my first words were: ‘She doesn’t look like me at all.’ Unexpectedly, my partner Michael burst into tears of joy.

I went home on the same day as I was frustrated with postnatal care. The photo above was taken the day after. While enjoying my newborn, I thought of adding a third name, perhaps April (Michael’s surname being Lamb) or Spring but then decided it was cruel rather than cute. Michela is the Italian, feminine version of Michael and Celeste is spelled the same in both languages. I realised later that the reason it came in my head was because it’s a family name. Also Celeste suggests celestial, which given that Michael means God Like, was a sort of synonym – but I disgress again!

The first weeks were a shock to both of us as sleep deprivation drove us mental. We had many arguments and resorted to co-sleeping as Michela hated her Moses basket. I chose to breastfeed, although Michael had a go with the bottle so he could feed her once a day. This was a source of arguments as I had problems expressing breastmilk and didn't want to use formula.

I told my birth story in the NCT newsletter and in a baby magazine and also commented on being an older mum for another publication. Being an ‘old’ mum means you’re more financially secure, can take a career break and you are calmer, less scared by things and more inclined to argue your way if health professionals give you advice you don’t agree with. On the downside, you are more tired so your evening outings are put on hold. I didn’t mind too much and found day outings I could take Michela to. The NCT socials and the sessions at the SureStart children’s centre were more than enough.

Michael took three months off work to be with us and it was the best gift ever. When he went back it was a huge shock and I had to plan my day carefully. I remember being desperate to go to the toilet but having to hold as Michela needed changing and/or feeding. I’m certain my bladder broke Olympic records.

Michela proved to be a nipple feeder and although it was painful, I persisted with breastfeeding. I weaned her the traditional way. Read my experience, plus information on traditional and baby-led weaning at www.simonecastello.co.uk/weaningways.pdf. If could go back in time I’d try a mix of traditional and baby-led weaning.

When Michela was one, I introduced cow milk but still breastfed. By then I was doing a course to become a breastfeeding helper and from the spring of 2008 I started volunteering at a BF cafe in Leyton. As I was still co-editing the NCT newsletter, I was quite busy.

In August we sold our house in London and relocated to Rugby, where I took over the NCT newsletter and started volunteering at the local BF cafe. If you're curious about it, visit www.rugbybreastfeedingcafe.co.uk/Rugby_Breastfeeding_Cafe/Home.html. The cafe has recently attracted local and national press coverage because it's launching a breastfeeding calendar.

Sadly, we are planning to relocate again. We've been touring all the counties commutable to London, as far as Lincolnshire (I could write a relocation blog with all we have been through) and are now set on Cambridge, where there is less property up for sale, the prices are still high and people are desperate to secure properties. We have been outbid on a lovely house by 20K and we might end up in rental again!

Michela is now two and still at home. In the past year I've been doing a bit of journo work and teaching Italian. The recession has hit the publishing industry hard but as I’m looking after my daughter full time, it hasn't ‘affected’ me too badly. I’m happy to work from home and diversify if things don’t pick up.

My top tip: if you experience any problems breastfeeding, seek help from the start. To find out about the charities who help breastfeeding mothers, read this article at www.simonecastello.co.uk/breastfeedingdebate.pdf

The story so far... part one

When I got pregnant in August 2006 I didn't know what to expect. I was a 39-year-old freelance subeditor working inhouse for several magazines based in London and loved my job. My main focuses were to climb the career and property ladders while enjoying all London had to offer in term of culture, sights and entertainment.

The first three months were hard – forget the nausea, my main problems was a crippling tiredness that made me crave sleep, which was inconvenient as my job involved staring at a computer while tinkering with Quark or InDesign. I remember editing a dry financial feature and fighting the urge to doze off.

And don’t start me on the commute to work, I rarely got a seat even when my bump showed, despite wearing the London Underground’s Baby on Board badge. I’m not knocking the badge, it’s a great idea as some men cannot distinguish between a fat and a pregnant belly (I was once offered a seat because my belly was bloated due to period pains, although I’m not so sure it was the belly or the short skirt that did it – but I’m disgressing here!).

As my belly grew disproportionally big to my petite frame, the nausea vanished but the tiredness didn’t and I started to have back pain too. Having an aching body, a fuzzy, sleepy head and a huge belly that touched the desk made my job less than desirable – as a hot-desking freelancer you are expected to give your all and don’t get the perks of pregnant staffers.

I went on maternity leave early, towards the end of January. I was getting all the rest I craved but my days felt too dull. So I started working on the novel I have been neglecting for years then volunteered to coedit the local NCT newsletter. This proved to be a lifesaver as I kept my skills sharp and learnt about creating a newsletter from scratch, which included writing the copy, commissioning, dealing with advertisers, making the most of real-life stories and members’ tips, designing the pages and sourcing free photography.

Closer to my due date, I attended an NCT class, which I highly recommend as you cannot have enough information about birth choices, breastfeeding and surviving the first months as a parent If you want to find out about the NCT and what it offers to parents, visit www.nctpregnancyandbabycare.com/home.

Local NCT branches throw a lifeline to parents and they are also a great social network – invaluable when all your friends are still single and/or childless. They won’t be as interested in your baby’s green poo and won’t have a clue on where to find a teether that works.

My top tip: when I was pregnant (pic shows me in my swimming costume at three months) I did an improver swimming course. When the course finished I kept swimming till close to the birth. I recommend swimming highly as the water supports your bump so you feel light and free - it's gentle exercise, too. Just don't use the breast stroke, as it's not recommended to pregnant women because of the softness of your ligaments during pregnancy.