Cold charity

I have volunteered at various charities and have occasionally seen and experienced some unpleasant things, but after having a rather shocking conversation with somebody who dismissed my occasional but regular volunteering by saying, "I don't really know you and you have been here only a couple of times", I'm feeling rather annoyed to put it mildly. I pointed out in a polite way that I was there more than a couple of times, but of course I didn't have a killer reply ready then (you only get those in hindsight). And to top the bill, my partner was "accused" in a veiled but still obvious way of switching a lower price on a puzzle at our local charity shop today. It beggars belief.

It just feels that being a volunteer is not unlike working for a company, you get bullied, treated unfairly and the ethics are as shaky as in the corporate sector. Several years ago I witnessed the verbal bullying of an individual coming from an ethnic minority group who was volunteering his time as a fundraiser. I didn't dare to say anything then, I was young, a bit naive and needed their references to apply for a job (I was fresh out of university). 


Even when this happened to myself at another charity I said nothing and left with good grace using an excuse. Why? Is it because I didn't want to harm an organisation that does good work? Later on I was bullied in my job and had to resign. I was working in a corporate environment and at least I was paid to take the crap, still I wish I did something rather than just resign and mention a personality clash in my exit interview.


But let's go back to volunteering, which is on the whole a really good thing to do as it helps a good cause, can provide you with new skills and open horizons. To be honest I had off-episodes in most charities I have volunteered, often from other volunteers. Lately I started to speak up when I don't agree rather than suffer in silence. I stay calm and say my piece, but I keep thinking of when I kept my mouth shut and regret it. 


On balance, for mums like me, volunteering is doing something great while on maternity leave or a way to get involved in the local community (children's centre, school, etc). When I started working again, I kept volunteering because it's such an enriching experience. You might do it for having something on the CV rather than just maternity leave, better your community and possibly get a character reference if applying for a job. But what if you get the mean treatment or it's difficult to get a reference? It's quite shocking how non-profit organisations can be no better than a profit organisation despite their assurances that they nurture their volunteers.


Still, despite all the off episodes, I still want to be a volunteer. If I stopped something would be missing from my life!

How volunteering rocks my world, plus breastfeeding news!

Breastfeeding a baby to sleep: classed as a bad sleep habit but a lifesaver for some mums

As I have already explained in an older post How I became a Homeworker, I find volunteering very rewarding from a personal and professional point of view. I get a warm feeling when I can donate my time to a good cause and it also benefits my working life.

I started volunteering in 1994 and through that first role as a fundraiser I acquired database and computer skills, plus learnt how to write a charity mail shot. This led to temporary bookings as database researcher, which was my first media job.

Between 1997 and 1999 I was in the committee of Women in Publishing, when I found the 'lost' archive and organised a few events. One was about independent bookshops and featured, among others, the occult bookshop Watkins! I volunteered for WiP hoping to get a job in book publishing but then switched to magazines after I trained as a subeditor. Still, I met many wonderful women, got some confidence and did chat to Fay Weldon, one of my fave feminist writers, at a Wip Christmas party.

So when I took maternity leave in January 2007,  I was itching to do something else and started volunteering for the NCT in the newsletter team. After some training I added another arrow to my volunteering bow by becoming a breastfeeding helper with the BfN. While the first role consolidated my writing/design skills and led me to specialise in parenting as a freelance writer, the latter gave me valuable knowledge about breastfeeding, which, again helped my writing. There is so much conflicting information about breastfeeding and knowing where to look and how things really work help me write good material. Recently I started helping out at my daughter's preschool, which is just lovely.

So after singing the praises of volunteering, here are some breastfeeding news, courtesy of my Google alert...

Is breastfeeding really best? Mum of five Aileen Hickie says mothers should not be bullied into breastfeeding... click here to read more.

I felt sad reading this article. Ireland has one of the lowest breastfeeding rates in Europe.

Facebook has 'boobed' by banning a picture of a woman breastfeeding her baby... click here to read more. 

Hip Hip Hooray... the penny has finally dropped! I know quite a few women who have proudly put pics up that have been censored.

"I need some advice about giving up breastfeeding. Please don’t judge me harshly. I have battled for six weeks trying to do it, but I am so miserable and am getting very down about it. Click here to read more.

Again, I felt really sad reading this as she has looked for help but cannot cope. I looked up stopping breastfeeding and there was very little info online, even on trusted encyclopedic websites like La Leche League International and Kellymom. As breastfeeding charities are supportive of mums’ choices, this question should be addressed fully. Going cold turkey, especially in the early weeks, could lead to engorgement and even mastitis. I also think that more expressing information should be out there as some mums might want to stop breastfeeding but still wish to give breast milk to their baby. The BfN has a great expressing leaflet here.

Breastfeeding moms don't get less sleep, says a headline on Reuters’ website. Click here to read more.
Yes, they actually get more sleep - this study proved it three years ago.

Breastfeeding is now compulsory in Indonesia as a law has been passed that stipulates all babies should be exclusively breastfed for the first six months. Click here to read more.
Wow! There are fines up to £7,000 and a prison sentence up to one year. Some might think it’s a case of nanny state but according to a recent government survey, "almost 40% of the children under five who were surveyed reported stunted growth due to malnutrition".

How I became a home worker

When I started maternity leave in January 2007 I planned to take a year off and resume my career as inhouse freelance subeditor. I had been doing it for over a decade, so it seemed like the easy option - I had lots of contacts in the industry and knew there would be work for me provided I could find reliable childcare for my child. Mind you, I envied freelancers who could work from home but knew that in my sector opportunities were rare, plus you needed expensive equipment and software. Despite using MACs at work, I had a modest PC at home and no fancy design software.

I soon realised I was missing work so jumped at the chance of using my skills for the NCT, which is the leading parenting charity in the UK. I had become a member before doing their antenatal classes and heard that they were looking for a volunteer to help the newsletter editor at the East London branch. I ended up coediting various newsletters, churning out articles and designing my half with zero budget (we had only money for printing costs). I was lucky to secure a free copy of QuarkXpress by buying a PC magazine so I could use the professional software I was accustomed to. I did enjoy both the writing and the design side. One year later, I was not ready to go back to work. I was enjoying a busy life as charity volunteer, doing some editing work from home (not much though) and training as a breastfeeding helper with the Breastfeeding Network. I started to volunteer for this second charity by assisting my tutor who ran a breastfeeding drop-in in East London. In summer 2008, just before the credit crunch hit the country, I moved to Rugby, where I became involved with the NCT, became newsletter designer and editor of the local newsletter and got involved with the Rugby Breastfeeding Cafe as a volunteer.

Not being in London meant a longer commute if I wanted to resume my career as subeditor. The recession also meant less freelance work so although I had set up my writing and editing business (and created a website to plug it), I was mostly giving Italian lessons and even taught an evening class at a local institute. Then I heard of a new parenting website that needed product testers and I sent my CV. I started writing product reviews, while running two blogs (this one about parenting and one about eco-friendly thrifting) and volunteering for my charities.

In November 2009 we moved to Cambridge, where I joined the local NCT branch and became involved with the newsletter and started volunteering at breastfeeding drop-ins. Soon after our move I got an email from an advertising agency who wanted me to write breastfeeding and baby care copy. It turned out to be a big project so I left tutoring behind and became a fully-fledged online copywriter, contributing to parenting websites whenever I could. I have recently started indexing academic journals, which is regular work and makes me feel that my degree in Political Sciences is of some use.

So far I have produced several NCT newsletters for various branches and learnt a lot about design, commissioning, advertising and the printing process. As a subeditor for major national magazines I was part of a big team, so I was only involved in editing, rewriting, writing the odd feature, fact-checking and perhaps a bit of design but didn’t have to concern myself with production processes, distribution, overall costs and advertising revenue. I kept in touch with the media industry through moderating a group called subsuk (from 2006 till practically yesterday) but have given this up as I am now a copywriter more than a journalist. I’m not the only one, most people I know from journo forums have moved into PR, advertising, corporate writing and more lucrative fields. Aside writing and indexing I volunteer for my two charities and have started to get involved in my daughter’s preschool activities.

So this is the story so far. The picture at the top is my office, basically an antique kitchen table (there is nice wooden top under the plastic cloth) full of useful junk. Below it’s my filing unit, which is a pine dresser my father made bespoke for the kitchen of my previous house. Inside there are backup DVDs and office supplies, on the shelves you can see my reference library and various odds and ends belonging to my child, including her red book and craft materials. More stationery is parked on top of the blue chest of drawers, one of my ‘revamp junk furniture’ projects.

There is a spare room upstairs which has been kitted out as an office but it’s not practical as I need to keep an eye on my daughter when she is at home. She goes to preschool three hours every afternoon and unless my partner is at home, she is around while I toil away. If I need total silence I work after she has gone to bed or wake up really early in the morning.

Now over to you! If you work from home, feel free to link up relevant blog posts and leave comments. I confess I do miss social interaction but not the commuting to different workplaces every week (unless I got a long-term gig) nor the office politics, from which an inhouse freelancer is not totally immune.

Christmas on a tight budget

Santa or Scrooge?

This year more than ever, we will have to scrimp at Christmas. I have written about leaner celebrations on other sites and publications - with titles like Cheap Christmas Cheer, Christmas on a Tight Budget and Beat the Credit Crunch: Christmas on a Budget - I am already starting to feel a bit more like Scrooge rather than Santa. But I'm not alone in my scroogehood, click here for an article on 50 ways to save money this Christmas.

Our household income has gone down and we are relying more on savings. Luckily, being a positive parent is all about giving the gift of time and attention, which are free at the moment as I haven't got that many work commitments.

I like to be active and productive so volunteering for various good causes has preserved my sanity. Before becoming a mum I had a career and skills and only using them (and my brain) can keep me away from the mental scrapyard. So I heartily recommend volunteering to those mums who want to engage their brain but need flexible timetables to accommodate child rearing. You never know, you might get a career out of it.

But back to the budget issue, I'm trying to find ways to make Christmas fun on a shoestring. This means using our old decorations, including the artificial tree and the plastic baubles. I'm sure Michela won't mind, like all toddlers she likes anything plasticy.

For presents we will be shopping around, not a novelty for us as in previous years we were careful with money for other reasons (buying a home and then going on maternity leave did hit our savings).

My great consolation is that in these tough times I am enjoying my daughter and she sees a lot of her Dad too. We have never been in favour of a too commercial Christmas anyway. Honestly, it's not sour grapes!

Obviously, we will shopping around for gifts. Prices of goods vary so much nowadays as some stores have amazing promotions to entice buyers. I have never seen as many as this year, obviously many people are not spending enough for retailers' liking.

So below are some discounts I have been emailed about, courtesy of Debenhams

Women
Lingerie 20% off womens Jasper Conran sleepwear and robes – offer ends 24th Dec -

Womens Accessories 30% off full price Nine West footwear – offer ends 24th Dec -

30% off Totes Gloves – offer starts 26th Nov and ends 12th Dec -


Men
30% off selected mens knitwear – offer ends 24th Dec -

25% off selected Shirts – offer starts 26th Nov and ends 24th Dec -

25% off selected Ties – offer ends 24th Dec -

£’s off selected outerwear – offer ends 24th Dec -

25% off selected designer seasonal accessories gift – offer ends 24th Dec –

Up to 50% off selected nightwear and slippers – offer ends 24th Dec -

Sports 20% off selected Womens sportswear – offer starts 26th Nov ends 24th Dec -

20% off selected kids sports clothing – offer ends 24th Dec




Home
20% off selected Cookware – offer ends 24th Dec -
 


20% off selected Decorative accessories – offer ends 24th Dec -


Gifts
20% off Meccano – offer ends 24th Dec -

Beauty VAT free on 500 Beauty products
 
Free gifts on Elizabeth Arden and Elemis, 10% off offer on YSL

Fragrance Event – either 30% or 50% off selected fragrances.

First impressions on living in Cambridge

Image by Getty Images via Daylife

We have been in Cambridge barely over a week and I feel at home already.

On the day of our move, the Queen visited the city to participate in the University's 800th anniversary celebrations. We missed the pageantry, all we saw were boxes and massive pieces of furniture being unloaded from two huge trucks.

Having relocated from London to Rugby and then from Rugby to Cambridge, I have lost a fair amount of friends and acquaintances. But I can recommend volunteering as a way to fit in quickly wherever you live.

Since the birth of my daughter I have been volunteering for two children’s charities: the NCT and the BfN. So as soon as I knew I was heading here, I contacted them both. Soon after my arrival, I went to an NCT meeting and a social, tomorrow I am going to a BfN drop-in for breastfeeding mums.

Today another opportunity to get involved locally arose when the organiser of the neighbourhood watch turned up, so yes, I’m going to a meeting next week.

This week I also met with an NCT member I used to know when we both lived in London and also with a mum from mumsnet. So internet forums can be handy too. And talking about the internet, there is a great local site for people living in Cambridge: Cambride Online. It has reviews and links to anything in the city.

I’m looking forward to experience all Cambridge has to offer. When I was living in Rugby, I did miss the buzz I get from living in a city, the cosmopolitan mix and the amenities. I'm not looking forward to buying our home as the property market is hard to crack here. For the moment we are renting and it's such a quiet area, despite being not too far from the centre.

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